Where does all of our time go?

My oldest son Alex has picked a specific university to correspond with that he is interesting in attending after graduation next June. I submitted his online paperwork today to get the application process started for him.


WOW, How did my little red haired baby boy grow up so fast? I remember him on his first day of kindergarten and how excited he was; now he's applying to colleges and planning the rest of his future. Don't get me wrong, I'm happy that he's taking an interest and being proactive; but I'm sad that the last 12 years of schooling seem like a big blur.

I don't know if I'm ready for him to go off to college and begin that whole new chapter in his life. I've been his only support his entire life.


Is that how the rest of my life is going to go? You blink your eyes and you miss the birth of your child. You sneeze and your child graduates school. I missed my 20th high school reunion last summer. Twenty years! That's just amazing to me. I still remember Clarice Tinsley from CBS here in Dallas speaking at my graduation. It seems like it was just yesterday, but it will be 21 years ago this coming June.


Its not that I'm feeling old, that's not the problem; its that I feel like I've missed things. I feel like my kids have grown up in front of me but I've been wearing blinders that are only open certain times of the day. Before I know it my youngest will be driving! Ugh, God help us all.

Its just sad how fast the time goes and we don't realize it until our kiddos are grown and gone from the house. I don't know what I'm going to do once Alex is gone away to school and I can't see him everyday. He's my first born, my sweet baby. I won't be able to see his sweet face every day. Now I'm sure that he would say that's a blessing, I think its sad. I'll miss him. But i know that at some point we need to let our "babies" go and move on to live their own lives.

I just don't know if I'm ready to cut those strings yet. Its going to be hard. I spoil my kids way to much and I know that in order for them to survive in today's society I need to teach them to sink or swim otherwise I will be doing them a huge disservice. They will never learn to take care of themselves if momma is constantly supporting them and giving them money.

So I'm ready to back up and let Alex make his own mistakes and learn his lessons. I just hope that I can be a good teacher and learn patience in the process. Because as we all know, every opportunity is a learning opportunity.